Photographs

In my childcare home I have always used photos to document our activities. I have created posters and booklets covering all the steps of big projects. Sometimes the photos are part of the activity – like this one. I have used photos in slideshows for workshops, presentations and on a digital display in the front entrance. As a good bye gift I provide each child with a photo album containing pictures arranged chronologically throughout the entire time they have attended.

Some of my oldest childcare photos were taken with a camera that required film and needed to be taken in to a photo lab to be developed. I’d have to order reprints to put in family albums and scan photos if I needed a digital copy. Taking and using photos became so much easier when I got a digital camera but even then there were occasions when the camera batteries died while we were on an outing and no more pictures could be taken until we go back and replaced them.

The number of photos I took increased dramatically when I got a rechargeable digital camera. So much so that I had to create a separate folder for unsorted photos and dedicate time on weekends to go through the week’s photos and file them according to activity like ‘sensory play’, ‘gross motor’, ‘art’, ‘constructive’, etc so it was easier to find specific photos when I needed them. My ‘Daycare Photos’ directory currently has nearly 10,000 photos in 20 folders with many sub-folders too.

When I got my first smartphone I stopped bringing my digital camera on everyday outings. It seemed like it would be easier to just use the camera on my phone instead. I was wrong. Taking photos with my phone was a slow process which at first I attributed to me learning a new skill. However, many years have passed and I’ve had several different phones and I still find it to be a slow process.

At first, I don’t think I noticed the decline in the number of photos I was taking. Actually, maybe I wasn’t taking fewer pictures, but I was definitely deleting more photos than I was saving. The quality of my phone photos was so much worse than the photos my little digital camera could take quickly.

Sure, my phone cameras were capable of taking good photos but only if I was willing to spend the time adjusting settings and planning each shot. However, most of the photos I take are very spontaneous and even the time required to load the camera app would be too long so I’d be left muttering ‘It would have been nice to have a photo of that’ *sigh*

My little point and shoot camera was so much more convenient to use. I kept the wrist strap on so the camera was always handy. The camera fit easily in my hand and one finger could reach all the controls. I never needed two hands to take photos so there was no need to put down the baby or whatever else I was carrying. This was extremely important since I rarely take photos when the children ‘pose’.

Most of my photos are pictures of the children in action. Either they are moving or I am moving or both. All my phone cameras have been way too slow to take decent action photos. Even if I have the camera app loaded and I am standing still, holding the phone with two hands the moving child will usually be just a blur if I even manage to keep them in the frame.

I suppose I could record videos with my phone and then select photos from the videos but that seems like a lot of extra work for which I have no time. My little camera allowed me to take photos while the children, not the camera controls, were my main focus. Honestly, the children’s focus is an issue too – many of them are obsessed with phones and will instantly stop what they are doing if they see a phone in my hand, so my phone is rarely handy for photos.

Recently I’ve noticed that the good-bye albums I’ve given to departing children were lacking. It has been surprisingly difficult to find enough photos to put in a 50 or 100 page album – even when children had been here for several years. When I was using my old camera I used to have to be selective and only choose the best photos of our favourite activities to include in albums – no way I’d have room to include all the photos.

The last few albums have had another noticeable issue too – the vast majority of the photos are of the children sitting at the table. Doing art, playing with small table toys, working on a puzzle, or eating food. These things are only a very small portion of our activities but comprise the majority of the photos. I believe it is due to the fact that when the children are seated at the table, my phone is handy on my nearby desk. It is the only time it is convenient for me to take photos with my phone.

Yes, there are some photos of the children in the playroom and of course more of the children outdoors. Yet, one thing that really upsetting for me is that there are almost no winter photos. We play outside every day – even in the winter – but I counted less than 30 pictures of the children in the snow in the last three years! As difficult and annoying as it is for me to use my phone to take photos in optimum conditions, the issues are magnified in the winter so usually I don’t even bother trying.

Last month I was so frustrated by the lack of new photos to add to the front entrance slideshow that I dug out my old camera and charged. I’ve even taking it outside when we were playing in the snow. It still hasn’t become a habit to have it handy but I have definitely take more photos lately – and generally the photo subject quality has been better too. Though, many of the children look somewhat confused as they do not recognize that object in my hand.

Three Things

I must say 2021 had its ups and downs but towards the end it really pushed my limits.

The first thing was the dishwasher. I know, dishwashers may be considered a luxury appliance more than a necessity for most people but the periods of time that I’ve been without a working dishwasher in my childcare home have proved to be difficult. I’ve replaced my dishwasher more times in my 25 year childcare career than all my other appliances combined. I will admit that I work them hard – running as many as three full loads per day.

My current dishwasher started acting up this past summer – occasionally it would leak, though not consistently. Sometimes it leaked immediately though sometimes I didn’t start leaking until it was more than an hour through the cycle and it often went for weeks without leaking at all.

It wasn’t just ‘when’ it decided to leak that was inconsistent but also ‘where’ it decided to leak from. Sure, if it always leaked from the door I could assume it was the door seal and replacing the gasket would solve it – but the gasket looked fine. Sometimes the door seal would be completely dry but there would be a river flowing from under the dishwasher across the kitchen floor – or worse, a waterfall in the basement that was not noticeable from upstairs.

Then, in the fall It started intermittently sending codes that it was unable to reach temperature high enough to sanitize. Being able to use my dishwasher to sanitize dishes, and toys, is extremely important. So as ‘unable to sanitize’ warnings increased and the constant supervision required to watch for leaks I just decided to stop using it for anything more than a drying rack. I’ve ordered a new one, but it won’t be here until February. *sigh*

The second thing was the little stray cat. On November 12th, just after the first snowstorm, my husband called me from the back door to tell me there is a very upset kitten shivering in our yard. I was busy with the children but told him if he could get it into the cat carrier and put it in the basement I’d post a picture on the neighbourhood association site to see if anyone in the area had lost it.

Working together my husband and son were able to contain the very upset kitten. No one in the neighbourhood claimed it though others in the area reported having seen it around for a month or more. It was terrified and starving, I could feel all its bones but it just curled, motionless, in a tight little ball when touched. I made a makeshift kennel for it in the basement so it could have a litter box and food dish but it still spent most of its time hiding at the back of the carrier.

I made several ‘ found cat’ reports and contacted shelters. No one had room for it – one suggested it sounded semi-feral and I should put it back outside. I certainly couldn’t do that, however, I also couldn’t have an unvaccinated cat around my cats or the children. I felt bad leaving it alone in the basement but at least it was warm, dry and had plenty of food which it devoured.

I knew it would have a better chance of settling down if it could at least see people and other cats so I took it to the vet. After two weeks of four meals a day ‘she’ now weighed 2.4 kg. ‘Beebe the basement cat’ was estimated to be 8 months old, now fully vaccinated, dewormed, tested FIV negative and cleared to be around people and other cats. She still only wanted to hide.

I had ordered a large three tiered kennel for her but the shipment was delayed. It the meantime I periodically brought her upstairs in the carrier for visits with us. She seemed to really enjoy watching TV and was extremely interested in anything on a plate – I was certain she had been in a home at some point in her past.

My two older cats were unimpressed by her presence but Montgomery absolutely loved her. He got so excited every time I brought the carrier up from the basement and sulked when I took it back down. Wherever Beebe was, Montgomery was as close as possible. Here they are enjoying the sunshine.

Beebe was not thrilled by all his attention and most definitely did not want to come out and play with him but she didn’t seem to mind the company if he remained calm. She also was becoming a little less timid – mewing from the basement when she heard me get up in the morning. Watching me prepare her food but running back to hide in the carrier when I got close.

Once the big kennel arrived she did seem a little more relaxed. Accepting pets and offering head butts through the bars as long as there was a barrier between us. Outside the kennel she was still very stressed. The kennel could be moved easily to various places on the main floor so she could enjoy the sunshine, watch the children play, or have some quiet time.

On December 23rd she went to the vet to be spayed. Initially still groggy when she came ‘home’ she did eat and move around. The following day she seemed a little less active but ate her food and used the litter box. She was alert and greeted me with head butts on Christmas morning but refused to eat. She deteriorated rapidly throughout the day and in the evening we took her to the emergency animal hospital. She was in respiratory distress and had arrhythmia. Sadly, euthanasia was the best option. RIP my poor little Beebe. – such a short hard life.

The third thing – day three of my four day Christmas break I was notified that I was a close contact of someone who had tested positive for Covid 19. As a precaution I decided to close for the three days between the Christmas long weekend and the New Year’s long weekend to give myself a 10 day isolation period and protect the children in my care. I am fully vaccinated and have now tested negative so it probably wasn’t entirely necessary.

Still, as 2022 begins I am happy to report that I am off to a great start. I’ve got almost all of my year end paperwork done already – it is usually March before I do that. I have completely cleaned and reorganized the basement – that has been on my ‘to do’ list for a very long time.

I am getting used to this handwashing all the dishes thing. Yes, there will be a lot more dishes once the children return, but I know the new dishwasher is coming so the extra work is temporary.

I have an empty cat kennel. I considered donating it to a shelter but then also thought it may be good to hold on to in case another stray cat in need shows up on my doorstep. I’m even contemplating possibly fostering cats/kittens – could risk becoming the crazy cat lady 🙂

Lazy

I don’t seem to be writing blog posts any more – at least not many compared to previous years. I was pondering why I was so uninspired to write.

We have done many interesting crafts and activities. We have gone on some adventures. I have done several small and large play space modifications. Yet, I have done very few posts about any of these things.

Is it a result of the pandemic? Maybe, though most of the restrictions have had very little impact on my day-to-day work life which is why there should be more posts to write. So, why am I not writing them?

Is it lack of time? Maybe, though I have always had long work hours and still managed to find time to write blog posts. Sure, sometimes I have a lot of bookkeeping work that is more urgent/time sensitive so blog posts have to wait. I have recently begun a couple of new projects that had necessary writing components but nothing that required vast amounts of time.

All of the committees I volunteer on have been meeting virtually – this has actually decreased the time commitment. There is no traveling time to/from the meetings and virtual meetings tend to be shorter than in-person ones which have more social interactions. Virtual ones are less fun though – often frustrating – and even somewhat depressing.

So maybe it isn’t the lack of actual time available outside my regular work and volunteer commitments that is the issue. Maybe the problem is the increased screen time. I have always struggled to stay focused on a screen for any length of time. I can’t fathom how teachers and students of any age can manage with online learning exclusively – even briefly. I personally would find it impossible. I struggle to focus on watching or listening to anything on a screen without something hands on to do.

I haven’t gone to a movie theater in over 30 years because there is no way I can sit in a seat though a whole movie with no commercial breaks or pause button. I don’t binge watch anything – in fact, I have some of my exercise equipment handy so I can keep ‘busy’ (active) while watching TV. Plus, I’m often baking things as well – hence the need for the commercial breaks and pause button. I’ve been known to wander away, get busy elsewhere and forget I was supposed to be watching something.

Of course, if too much screen time is the problem then going outside is the solution. Screen time can be overstimulating – a sensory overload that zaps creativity. Most certainly I will be much happier outside but not necessarily more productive. Yes, going outside is refreshing and offers a ‘reset’ when I am overwhelmed or stressed, but does not always help me focus.

Outside I can can completely lose track of time, daydreaming, getting lost in my imagination. It is a wonderful place for reflection, and wonder but there are far too many distractions for me to stay focused on an activity like writing a blog post. In fact, just writing about going outside is currently distracting be from finishing this post.

Outdoors is relaxing – an opportunity to unwind and feel grounded. Working in the garden, exploring the neighbourhood or going on long hikes provide connections to nature. So many things to hear, see, smell and feel. None of these activities feel like exercise to me. Even very physical outdoor activities like shoveling snow or completing major landscaping projects don’t feel as strenuous as a gym workout.

So, maybe I’ve now figured out what the problem is…

The gym is closed – and even for the brief periods they have been allowed to open, they had limited hours and did not open early enough for me to go. Many years ago, when I first joined a gym, I went in the evening after work. I quickly discovered that this was a bad idea. After a high intensity workout I am so energized that there is absolutely no chance I would be going to bed any time soon. For a morning person like me, late nights mean no sleep at all since I simply cannot sleep past dawn and actually prefer to get up before the sun.

So, for me, the best time for a visit to the gym is 4 or 5 AM several times each week. High intensity cardio between sets of weight training and my mind is racing – writing posts, planning activities and designing spaces – and it keeps going all day long, The limited space and equipment I have available at home just doesn’t provide the same opportunity for this type of workout.

Hence, I feel lazy, unmotivated and unable to focus. I am still getting things done but it is taking me a lot longer. This simple blog post has taken several hours over many days. I could normally finish a post like this in under an hour after an invigorating morning gym workout.

Early morning is my most productive period and that is the part of my daily routine that has been significantly disrupted. It is the high intensity morning workout that I need to kick-start my day and improve my ability to focus.

Traffic Woes

I get excited every time I hear mention of lowering speed limits. At the moment it is only residential streets that the city of Winnipeg is considering lowering speed limits on but if I had my way it would be ALL the streets and lanes. If I were in charge back lanes would have a max speed of 20 km/h, residential streets would be 30 km/h, undivided main streets could be 40 km/h and only divided ones could be 50 km/h. Main roads with three or more lanes in each direction could have a speed limit of 60 km/h. Major roads with absolutely no pedestrian traffic could allow speeds up to 70 km/h. No roads anywhere inside city limits require any speed over 70 km/h – if you want to drive faster, take the perimeter.

I’m sure some people may be horrified at the thought of driving that slow and it may make you angry that I also think there should be traffic cams and photo radar everywhere. There is photo radar near my home – and there is also a guy that frequently stands on the corner and holds a cardboard sign to warn drivers of the camera ahead. I once told him he should just let them get a ticket – a consequence for their actions. He probably drives a black truck…I’ll explain why later.

It is no secret that I love to walk places – I do also drive, but whenever possible I prefer to walk in all types of weather. Actually, even in very cold weather I would prefer to walk than sit still in a frigid cold vehicle. Still, sometimes even I must drive instead of walking. Those drivers (and pedestrians) that choose to defy road rules cause me angst both as a driver and a pedestrian. Though sometimes even the drivers that are trying to be ‘helpful’ are really not.

My childcare home is located in a residential area that is bordered by several major streets. Even if we were to restrict our daily walks to the sidewalks in our little neighbourhood we would not be able to avoid disrespectful drivers taking shortcuts to avoid slowing down for traffic at the busy intersections. That is one reason why, throughout all our walks, in our neighbourhood and beyond, the children and I have constant conversations about all aspects of the environment around us.

Those conversation may be observations about decorations in someone’s yard/garden, birds, plants, people, animals and most definitely vehicles. Everything is a teachable moment – an opportunity to share an interesting fact, personal likes/dislikes, and of course identifying hazards. Is it safe to pet that dog without the owner’s permission? Is that tree/fence an appropriate place to climb or does if belong to someone else? Will that driver stop for us or should we wait?

Long before we have even reached an intersection we will notice if there are stop signs and count them. We discuss which direction we are planning to cross and whether the cars should be stopping for us or if they have the right of way and we should be waiting for them. Respect for drivers and pedestrians goes both ways. That is where we sometimes meet those ‘helpful’ (not) drivers that stop where they do not have a stop sign and try to let us cross – it is confusing for the children but luckily it doesn’t happen often.

I wish our encounters with disrespectful, anti-pedestrian drivers were as infrequent. As pedestrians we always follow the road rules – many of which already strongly favour vehicles over pedestrian. For example, at all the intersections with traffic lights in my neighbourhood my little group can barely make it all the way across the intersection before the light turns red IF we start instantly when it turns green AND we hustle all the way across. If our light is already green when we reach the intersection we won’t have enough time to cross and will wait for the next green light – another opportunity to observe traffic and discuss safety rules.

We have encountered drivers who are too impatient to wait for us to cross the street before they make their left turn and will try to turn in front of us instead of waiting for us to cross first. One driver actually thought it was necessary to turn into the oncoming lanes first before crossing over to the proper lanes just so he didn’t have to wait for us to clear the lane he should have turned into. He must have actually planned this in advance considering, like us, he had been waiting at a red light prior to entering the intersection and was most certainly aware of our intention to cross.

Another one of my personal opinions is that all slip lanes should be eliminated. Even though I put reflective safety vests on all the children when we go for walks near traffic, some drivers don’t see us – or choose to ignore our attempt to cross the slip lane. Other cities have some great ideas for replacing slip lanes. I’m certain the businesses on the corner near my home would appreciate the increased pedestrian traffic if the slip lane was removed.

Back lanes are another issue. I am sure that there are drivers that think pedestrians shouldn’t use back lanes – ever. Personally I think both pedestrians and vehicles can both use back lanes if they need to access property located on that lane. The children and I DO walk down my back lane to get to my back yard but we don’t travel down back lanes when we have no purpose to go there. Whenever we see a vehicle we move off the lane, into the nearest driveway, and stand still respectfully yielding right of way to the passing vehicle. This is easy to do IF the drivers are also respectful and obeying speed limits.

I am fairly certain that only the drivers who actually live on our lane obey the speed limit – which is still too fast. The drivers using the lane as a thoroughfare or shortcut to avoid the lights drive much faster than the lane speed of 30 km/h. In fact, there have been vehicles that sped down my lane so fast that I couldn’t tell you what colour the vehicle was because all I saw was a blur as they passed my yard.

When there is no snow the lane is wide enough to allow cars to pass us even if they don’t choose to wait for us to get off the lane. In warmer seasons we do always walk on the edge of the lane but we still try to move into a driveway when a car approaches. In the winter the piles of snow along the edges of the lane make it impossible to walk there and the tire ruts are treacherous. For this reason we tend to walk in the middle of the lane in the winter.

When there is ice and snow, we move slower and have fewer spaces to get off the lane when we see a vehicle. I always remain in the centre of the lane until all the children have reached a safe spot and are standing still so there is no chance they may slip back into the lane. Consequently sometimes drivers must stop and wait for us and some of them find this very frustrating – especially the ones that are using our lane as a shortcut to avoid the traffic at the major intersections. This is where we have met the driver of the black truck…

The first time we saw this particular truck approaching, I stood in the middle of the lane as usual however, when the driver did not slow his approach I grabbed the last child and jumped to the side of the lane as he swerved slightly around us. I don’t care how great you think your steering skills are, I still expect that you will also use your brake pedal! We have encountered this truck several times now and he has never slowed down.

We haven’t been for long walks since the weather got very cold so our schedule has changed. We’ve also taken to only walking the short way down the lane just in case the driver of the black truck chooses that route. Still, one day when we were almost to my driveway, the three-year-old ahead of me yells “Ackk, it’s him again! I don’t like that guy.” and then scurries up the driveway into my yard.

The black truck had just turned onto the far end of the lane ahead of us. I find it sad that a three-year-old can recognize a disrespectful driver from almost a block away. Just slow down. Please.

To Close or Not To Close

Everyone is being affected by the Covid-19 pandemic – for some it may be just a mild inconvenience, for others it may be a major disruption to their daily lives. Some people are overwhelmed and beginning to panic while others are completely nonchalant.

For those of us working in childcare the big question has been ‘Is the daycare going to close?’ and the only available answer has been ‘We don’t know.’

Even in the field there are arguments both for and against closing childcare facilities. Many think that because the schools are closing, childcare facilities should too. Others argue that childcare is an essential service and must remain open for those parents who need to go to work.

My personal, possibly not popular opinion, is that licensed childcare facilities should NOT be forced to close.

Certainly, any sick children or staff should not be there and should be isolated at home, but what about those children whose parents still need to go to work? If they have a spouse or other family member who is temporarily off work then they have options but what if they don’t?

What if their only available childcare option is Grandma – whose immune system is already compromised? Maybe another choice is the unlicensed childcare provider who wasn’t forced to close and now has agreed to temporarily take in any and all the children who need childcare.

Wouldn’t a licensed childcare facility – with strict cleaning and disinfecting procedures already in place – be a better option?

Yes, social distancing is a very difficult if not impossible concept for children but most trained early childhood educators have the skills to implement games and activities to limit direct contact. Many of us will actually be spending most of our time playing outdoors in the fresh air.

If licensed facilities are forced to close where will those children go? Are they able to be with their family or are their parents at work and the children are huddled on the couch watching movies with their friends. What if their parents’ only option now is to send them to that one person on the block who says ‘No problem, send them all here, we’re having a party’.

Sure, if parents are off work and able to use this situation to be isolated at home spending quality time with their family that is probably the best option. The reality is that there are still a lot of parents who need to go to work and closing all licensed childcare facilities might just be the worst thing to do.

Mail Delivery

I checked the mail last Tuesday afternoon. There were three envelopes in my mail box – one was addressed to my husband, there was a Christmas card addressed to a different house on my street, and the third item was addressed to my house number but on a nearby street with a much different name.

*Sigh* Here we go again. This isn’t the first time I’ve received mail addressed to someone else. I find it happens several times over a few weeks and then not at all for a while. That makes me think it may be due to a substitute mail carrier but I’m not entirely certain there is a regular mail carrier. I have seen several different mail carriers in the neighbourhood at various times of the day and there is nothing consistent about when my mail gets delivered.

I was annoyed – the addresses on these envelopes were clearly written so there was no doubt they didn’t belong at my house. Usually when I get someone else’s mail I just go out after the children have left for the day and drop the envelopes at the correct address. No big deal for me but I can’t help wondering if there is some of my mail at someone else’s house and they can’t be bothered to correct the mistake.

I had a busy evening planned and didn’t have time to deliver the mail Tuesday evening so I decided to wait until the following day. The children and I go for a walk every day – we could just take the letters with us and drop them off while we are out.

The children were actually thrilled by the task – their biggest concern was that there wasn’t more mail for them to deliver. This was the point when my mind began to spiral out of control. What if we could solve the childcare funding crisis by paying childcare homes and centres to deliver the mail?

Seriously! It is not child labor, it is curriculum – literacy, numeracy, physical activity – in a way that excites the children. There are schemas involved too – transporting, ordering, enclosing…maybe some trajectory. Don’t get me started on the social skills and art – once the toddlers figure out there is someone on the street that never gets any mail there will be a massive art project to rectify that!

Ok, so I don’t really want to suggest that we take jobs away from the mail carriers who have a greater than 33% accuracy rate so this doesn’t have to be a permanent position – maybe just to cover when the regular mail carrier is on vacation. It could be like a fundraiser- how much does Canada Post pay for two weeks of mail delivery? Probably more than we’d make selling chocolate bars. We would rather deliver mail.

Alright Canada Post – your move – what do you think?

Parent Fees & Private Childcare

So, I wrote this post more than a week ago, published it, reread it, didn’t like it, removed it, rewrote it – twice, and I think now it might be at least a little closer to what I want to say. Writing is hard sometimes.

Childcare is an important issue for many parents in Manitoba – more specifically, the lack of access to quality, affordable childcare. I’ll admit that during the last provincial election I got more than a little excited when the PC government promised to streamline the licensing process to encourage more family childcare providers to become licensed – it is not often that the government puts any focus on home based childcare. Sadly, they then froze grant funding and encouraged newly licensed unfunded providers to charge higher parent fees.

Now I will also think parent fees could be increased to help offset all the increases in expenses faced by childcare facilities. I thought this article by Tom Brodbeck was interesting. Even in my lower income area most unfunded and/or private, unlicensed home based providers charge parent fees that are much higher than my parent fees – and parents pay it. In higher income neighbourhoods and daycare deserts unfunded/unlicensed homes often charge considerably more. Maybe it is a parent’s ‘choice’ to put their child in private, unlicensed/unfunded care with higher parent fees – or maybe it is their only available option.

Funded family childcare providers like me are not allowed to raise our parent fees if we want to keep our funding. In a funded childcare facility parent fees for a preschool child are only $2.70 per day higher today than they were 22 years ago when I first began my childcare career. Over those years I have received increases in my operating grant funding so that it is now 28% of my gross income instead of just 5% of my income 22 years ago. Still, even with that grant funding and parent fees combined my income is still less than that of most private home daycares – about $13.38 per hour for hours I spend with the children – prep, cleaning and paperwork are all unpaid hours.

So yes, I am horrified when I hear a politician say they want to create portable subsidies for low income families to use in private childcare facilities because I know that even with portable subsidies those parents will still be paying much more than what they would pay in a funded, licensed facility – which already accept subsidized families. The problem is there are not enough funded licensed spaces – so the politicians say they will increase the number of licensed childcare spaces but if they don’t fund them then the parent fees will need to be increased in order to cover the costs of operating.

Even funded childcare centres are finding it difficult to attract or retain staff with the current set parents fees. When I hear politicians promise to lower parent fees to make childcare more affordable for parents I want to scream ‘Do you have any idea how much additional grant funding it will take to compensate for lower parent fees?’ Or are you planning to lower wages too and drive more ECE’s out of licensed care.

Trained ECE’s are already leaving their jobs in childcare centres and some of them are choosing to open private, unlicensed childcare homes. I fully understand the allure of home based childcare but with no funding available for new providers there is no financial benefit to becoming licensed – in fact they will probably earn more being unlicensed/unfunded and only accessible to higher income families willing/able to pay higher parent fees. There are no numbers available as to how many unlicensed childcare homes there are because there is no way to track that because they are unregulated. There are only just over 200 licensed home based providers in the whole province – far fewer than there were when I first became licensed.

Many parents and even politicians do not understand the difference between licensed and private childcare homes. When I was talking to a politician on my doorstep and mentioned that I was a licensed family childcare provider they said they had met a couple of other providers on my street – they couldn’t tell my if they were licensed or not ‘but they had business cards’. *sigh* Not licensed – there are no other licensed providers on my street – or any of the streets around me – that is easy to check here.

It is true that licensing does not guarantee ‘quality’ but I think ‘unlicensed’ is also ‘unprofessional’ even, or maybe especially unprofessional if you are a trained ECE. Many parents may not understand the difference between training and licensing and not realize that their trained private provider is in fact not licensed. In Manitoba a private home childcare provider, trained or untrained, may not care for more than four children under 12 years of age including their own children. Yet, I know many trained ECE’s whose only experience is in centre based care and who are surprised to learn that child/caregiver ratios are different in home based childcare. I also hear from many parents who are unable to find licensed childcare and have placed their child in a private home but are unsure how many children are actually being cared for there.

Yes, training enhances the quality of childcare but it is licensing and funding that enable childcare to be accessible and affordable. Private childcare is not affordable nor accessible especially for low income families even if there was a subsidy available. I don’t believe families of any income level would choose unlicensed care if there was enough licensed care available.

Maybe what should be suggested is that childcare waitlists and enrollment forms should include information about each family’s income level so licensed funded childcare facilities could weed out all the high income earners who were using up all the childcare spaces with low parent fees when they could really afford the higher fees in the private centres. I’m sure that then we’d hear a lot more public outcry that it is not fair that licensed care is only accessible to low income families.

So, I love my job and I wouldn’t want to do anything else and so far I can still pay all my bills and I get to play outside and I get paid in hugs every day so I shouldn’t complain – right? There are so many other people who are worse off than me – but really, that is my point. Even though, like other licensed funded facilities, my parent fees haven’t increased and my grant funding has been frozen for the past three years and my expenses have increased – I can still provide childcare to low income subsidized families.

Yes, I could drop my funding and raise my parent fees and still be licensed but earn more money – but then I’d have to exclude low income families and I won’t do that. I will continue to pay 22% of my taxable income back to the government because I know paying taxes is important for everyone. Then I’ll use my remaining $2400 a month to pay my ever increasing bills so I can be here for the families that trust me to provide care and education for their children while they go work to pay their bills and their taxes. I also really, really hope that the government then uses all those tax dollars to help those who don’t have as much as I do instead of offering it to those who already have more than they need.

Driving My Car

Let me stray a little away from writing about children and childcare and tell a more personal story about safety and security vs risk, fear and anxiety.

Like every teen from my generation I got my beginners license when I was sixteen. Learning to drive was a rite of passage signifying a new freedom and responsibility. It was a responsibility that I took very seriously. I took the driver’s ed course THREE times – the first two times I refused to take the final driving exam. My instructor insisted that I was ready but I was not certain. Finally, just after my eighteenth birthday I decided that I was ready – took the driving exam and passed without issue.

For many years I drove regularly both in the city and on the highway but I was always a cautious driver. I have never turned on the radio while driving – passengers in my car were always allowed to play music if they wanted to turn it on but I would just block it out and focus solely on driving. If I needed to adjust the heat or other controls I would only do so while parked – once in motion the road and vehicles around me were my only concern. I strictly adhered to all road rules but was very aware that many other drivers did not.

I wouldn’t say I feared or even disliked driving – in fact, I found it quite relaxing in the right conditions. I always considered things like rain, darkness, heavy traffic and road construction to be a little stressful but they didn’t prevent me from driving. Surprisingly ice and snow never bothered me – maybe because I learned to drive in the winter. Still, driving was never on my list of my favourite things to do and if my destination was walk-able or had limited parking available then I would always choose to walk or take a bus.

I don’t know exactly when driving became something I dreaded – it was probably a gradual process – something I blame at least partly on news media for their coverage of horrific motor vehicle collisions. Maybe it was after many years of driving ‘beater’ cars – we often owned two or even three at a time, none costing more than a few hundred dollars – essentially ‘disposable’ if/when they broke down. I lost count of the number of times I was tasked with steering a car on the back end of a tow rope on the way to the wrecker.

Yet honestly, driving those beaters might have actually increased my driving confidence. One of my favourites had been our old Mercury Marquis station wagon – I could trust that old car to start and keep going in any weather on any road. The body however was not great – some parts were held together with duct tape. The tailgate latch was broken so we used a hasp and padlock to lock it. We usually simply rolled down the back window to load/unload stuff anyway because the tailgate hinges were unlikely to hold the weight of the opened door.

Probably the main reason I liked this car so much was because other drivers did not. If I wanted to change lanes I only had to put on my turn signal and all nearby vehicles slowed down & moved out my way – no one wanted to be too close to my monstrosity . Perfect – it made it possible for me to maintain my large personal bubble no matter how much traffic there was or how slowly I wanted to drive. Talk about owning the road!

When I opened my childcare home I felt a bunch of beater cars in various states of repair would not make a good impression so we cut down to just two fairly decent used vehicles. With me working from home we didn’t often need the second vehicle but it was nice to have for those times when our main vehicle broke down and my husband needed to get to work. My stay-at-home job was also probably a factor in making me dislike driving – the rare occasions when I needed to drive somewhere caused some anxiety about my lack of practice.

We also discovered that decent used vehicles still needed repairs and we no longer had the time nor space for DIY car repairs. The higher purchase prices meant we were more likely to repair these vehicles instead of replacing them and shop repairs were expensive. Even limiting repairs to only the bare minimum to keep the vehicle operational was taking a toll on our finances.

For many years, every repair required for our vehicles brought questions about the vehicle’s history. Had past owners neglected basic maintenance? Had the vehicle been involved in a collision? There was so much we didn’t know about our old vehicles and it affected our decisions. This uncertainty and all the ‘what if’ questions made me hesitant to drive – anxious – often without any identifiable reason.

Frustrated by used car breakdowns and expensive repairs we contemplated buying a new car. I did some calculations on the purchase price and repairs for our current used car over the three years we had owned it vs the payments for a new car over the same time period – new car payments would be less. So, in 2009 we decided to take the plunge an bought a brand new Mitsubishi Outlander.

I’ll admit, I did have a bit of a panic attack when I realized the total at the bottom of the invoice was more than our family’s gross income for a full year! Yet, for the first time I really enjoyed driving – the way the car smelled, the way it handled, the silence inside as I drove – so amazing. I often volunteered to drive for outings and I actually looked for excuses to take the car instead of walking or to make multiple trips instead of consolidating all my errands into one trip.

I also became more anxious – other drivers did not fear my new car and they came far closer to me than I was comfortable with. I sometimes held my breath for long periods of time while driving and occasionally needed to pull into a parking lot just so I could sit still and breath for a few minutes. I appreciated frequent red lights as they were opportunities to stop and breath without pulling off the road.

As much as I liked my new car it became much easier for me to just let others drive me everywhere I needed to go. This was especially if true if there was any type of time restraint. When I did drive I always gave myself twice as much time as required for ‘worst case scenario’ so I could be assured I would never have to rush and would have plenty of time for breathing breaks.

I had vowed to take the best possible care of my new car and scheduled every recommended service at the time indicated. I was quite surprised about how expensive all this vehicle maintenance cost. I was also disappointed by the number of repairs required. Yes, many of the repairs were covered under the new vehicle warranty – like having the transmission replaced after only 72,000 km. Still, others were blamed on bad roads because ‘reckless’ driving was definitely not a factor.

In the past year our not-so-new car has need some fairly major repairs that were not covered by any warranty. I first started this post last month when I was very, very angry. Angry that my car was in the dealer’s service centre for a whole week due to yet another costly repair. Angry that even all the expensive routine maintenance doesn’t ensure problems are caught early enough to prevent major issues – or maybe the service people noticed and didn’t care enough.

I was/am angry at everyone that made, sold or serviced my car. Angry that in the past year repairs on my ‘good’ vehicle have cost more than the purchase price of our ‘beater’ van – the one we use for any messy, heavy, or risky purpose so we don’t damage our ‘good’ vehicle. Our ‘beater’ van which has not had any type of service or repair in the seven years we’ve owned it.

Yet mostly I am angry that I am even more reluctant to drive now. I am unsure I can trust my car. I am concerned something else may break when I am driving. I’m annoyed that my ‘what if’ list is growing so much longer. I’m frustrated that my pre-driving planning for all the what-if’ has become so extensive that I could probably walk anywhere in the city in less time than it takes me to prepare, drive and recover.

So yes, I started this post in anger but over the month I’ve been writing it has kind of morphed into something else. It may actually be yet another example that efforts to increase safety and security may simply increase fear and anxiety – even for those of us who understand the importance of assessing and taking risks.

Confession

This year, like every year, I planned multiple summer projects and so far I’ve managed to complete many of them.  There is however one project that is not proceeding as well as I had hoped.  The weather this summer is partly to blame – you see, I planned to work on reorganizing the basement on rainy days when it was too wet to work outside in the yard. There have been many days when it was too hot to work outside in the yard and it might actually be nice to spend some time in the basement but that little voice in my head always whispers ‘You are suppose to wait until it is raining‘ and of course it never does.

In my basement there is a twelve foot section of wall that is filled from floor to ceiling with plastic bins like this storing toys not currently in use;

Yes, they all have lovely labels describing what each bin contains.  There are also labels on all the art supply storage boxes on shelves and other various spaces throughout the house.  Visitors always comment on how organized I am. LOL

The problem is that some of those bins and boxes don’t actually contain what the label says they do.  In fact, in the basement, beyond the locked door in the area that is off limits to the children there is loose stuff. Much of the loose stuff belongs in one of those labelled bins but it doesn’t fit in it because there is something in that bin that doesn’t belong in there. This is what happens when I plan too many weekend projects and don’t get around to rotating toys until late on Sunday then don’t have time to put things away properly.  ‘I’ll fix it later’ I say.  Well,  this summer I intended to fix it – but it hasn’t rained enough so it is not done yet.

That’s not the confession.  The confession is that – and this may not actually surprise anyone – I think I might be a hoarder.  You see, along with reorganizing and putting things in their proper bins I also planned to purge – yes, I was going to get rid of stuff we don’t use.  Stop laughing! I’m serious. That was, IS my plan.

Every weekend I get a little more done.  Loose stuff and mystery boxes get spread out on the tables;

Some stuff gets boxed up to donate (it is kept out of sight so I won’t be tempted to take it back).  There are several empty shelves in the basement now;

There are only a few ‘sorting boxes’ left on the basement floor;

At one point there was barely any room to walk in the basement but now there is plenty of space, several empty bins, and new labels have been made so everything is accurate.

I’d also like to point out that I think that my ‘problem’ may have been caused by elementary school teachers.  It was my (now an adult) son’s Kindergarten teacher that asked me (and other parents) to collect milk jug lids and that is why I had a container full of hundreds of milk jug lids in the basement.  If you still need them – too late, I don’t have them any more.  I don’t have any shoe boxes either.  All those sleepless nights fretting about how my child was going to fail diorama making because I didn’t buy shoes that came in boxes with lids.  So, I started collecting shoe boxes – and now I just flattened dozens of them and overfilled my recycling bin.

I also have some extra space so I picked up a few more jungle animal toys.  Didn’t really need more – I had some already but now I have families of jungle animals.  I simply have to try and fit the new ones in the bin with the old ones.

I do still have a bin, two boxes and a shelf full of empty food and spice containers – I know I don’t need that many but I haven’t sorted through them to decide which ones are the most useful – remember, my recycling bin was too full.  I still have time.  Summer is not over yet and it might even rain sometime.  Besides, sometimes it is really cold in the winter and I might want to do things inside.  That is usually when I plan to defrost the freezers (which have a thick layer of ice now because last winter I waited too long and Spring arrived). Probably I should catch up on paperwork first though.

I may have other issues besides just hoarding stuff…

Students & Mentors

Throughout my career I have had many opportunities to welcome students and other educators into my home for tours, observations and practicum placements. I have found these visits to be enlightening and I am certain that I learn just as much or more than any of the ‘students’.

Sometimes visitors are here outside of regular working hours simply to see my childcare environment and get ideas for their own programs.  When there are no children present we have plenty of time for discussions and often the visitors will ask why I have things arranged the way they are.  Even as I answer their questions I may also begin to ponder ‘Is this really the best way or could I do it differently?’

The visitors who come for ‘observations’ have the most difficulty and sometimes it is downright hilarious.  Usually they’ve been instructed to ‘observe’ the children and/or me but not ‘interfere or interact’ with us. LOL The second they entered the room they became the children’s favourite toy.  “Who are you? What are you writing? Can I have your pen/some paper? I drew a flower. I have Darth Vader on my shirt. Do you like light sabers? We aren’t supposed to hit with toys. I’m hungry, did you bring a snack? …. It doesn’t end and honestly I doubt anything they observe would resemble a ‘normal’ day.

My favourite visitors are the Early Childhood Education students here for their practicum placement.  They come for longer periods of time – usually six full days.  They are expected to join in and even plan activities.  They get to know us and we get to know them.  All of the practicum students that have come here were part of the Red River College Workplace program which means they already have experience working in licensed childcare facilities.  Usually these students have only had experience working in centres but have expressed an interest in learning more about family child care as a possible career choice in the future.

They already understand child development and guidance.  Many are well acquainted with licensing regulations, policies and procedures – at least in the centres in which they work.  Some have already worked in childcare for many, many years as childcare assistants.  Really there is little or nothing I could teach them about doing their current job.  However, they are here to learn about family childcare and for most of them that is something new – and very different from what they currently do.

The first comment I hear when these practicum students arrive is almost always ‘I can’t believe how quiet it is’.  Yes, even though I may not always find it ‘quiet’ here, in comparison to working in a centre it is very quiet.  Sometimes I even find it too quiet – especially when I have a particularly independent group or there are some children absent.  There are days that I am tempted to initiate new activities simply because I am bored – I have to stop and consider if the children would actually benefit from my activity or if I would be interrupting a wonderful child-led experience in order for me to feel more productive.

Of course the play space also excites many of the students – especially the use of environmental guidance so I/they don’t have to  constantly provide direct guidance.  I love that the students recognize this.  🙂 They also note how easily the children choose, engage, and clean-up activities with little or no assistance from me.  We often share stories about behaviour issues we’ve experienced at our respective programs and how changes to the environment have/could address them.  I think that the ability to control the environment is what draws many centre staff to family childcare – they see issues at their workplaces, have ideas that could help but for whatever reason are not permitted to implement them.

However, I don’t feel that these practicum students ever experience ‘real’ family childcare when they are here.

Firstly, they are only here for eight hour days, not the eleven I normally spend with the children each day.  The college also expects that I will give them  breaks – many of the students choose to forego their break and leave earlier instead.  There was one who never wanted to leave and often stayed longer than required but still not my full day.  One insisted on taking her lunch break at lunch time – the busiest part of my day – instead of joining the children and I for lunch.  She spent an hour sitting in her car and returned when I had the kitchen clean and all the children settled in for their naps.  In my opinion there were several factors that made me doubt she was suited for ANY position in childcare.

Secondly, these students are never alone here or in their regular workplace.  Certainly there are times when I busy myself elsewhere and observe the student engaging with the children independently but they are not truly  ‘alone’.  There is nothing I can do to allow the students to experience what it is like to be the only one responsible for doing everything all day, every day.  As much as they may think that they would love to be their own boss, that freedom comes with a whole lot more responsibility and time commitment than their current jobs.

Then there is all the other stuff – the evening and weekend stuff when the children are gone.  The cleaning, the paperwork, contacting prospective parents, meetings, interviews and more – the students see none of that.  Are they prepared for the challenge to their work/life balance when they work from home – and what about their families?  The ‘family‘ portion of family child care is a HUGE factor and many providers who choose FCC specifically to stay at home with their own children also discover they prefer working in a centre and can’t wait to ‘get their house back’.

I have had a couple students who claim to understand how much time is required for FCC but then remark that they aren’t actually planning to work in their ‘real’ home because they ‘won’t do that to their family’.  They want to rent/buy a second house or use some other space away from their true home.  We sit down and review some regulations and do some financial calculations for FCC income vs expenses for a separate space. Even if the regulations allowed it, financially this is not a viable option.

Family childcare homes are not centres – they cannot be run the same nor can they be compared to centres.  Not all ECE’s with experience in centres are equipped for working in homes and many FCC Providers would not survive working in centres.  Still, there is a lot we have in common and there is a lot we can learn from each other.

My experiences with mentoring practicum students has been enlightening.  I have observed how the behavior of the children in my care, in my environment, changes with the addition of another caregiver.  I’ve been able to reflect on whether it something I do or the student does that influences the behaviours.  I’m also certain that even though there are days when I could use an extra set of hands to get everything done, I am still much happier working alone.  That’s not the case for everyone – some ECE’s need the larger groups and daily interaction with colleagues and family childcare may not be the best fit for them.